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Truth

Truth
Bleeding

Disclaimer:

Everything you read here should be considered fiction. Patient rights will always be respected. Any resemblance to persons living or not is purely coincidental.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Response and responsibilities

Been too busy.  Too busy to write, too busy to think.

Working on ambulances, running calls.  Trying to study protocols.  Trying to study for graduate school.
Trying to get excited about going to work at my 'real job'.  Finding out that my responsibility level may increase there and having a hard time caring about it.  My boss may get a temporary promotion, then I would be doing more of the stuff I hate about my job.  Great.

Not getting much done.  Becoming an expert in procrastination.

EMS is my escape.  Escape from the drudgery of data management.  Escape from monotone webinars and useless "FYI" email messages.

When I'm on a call, the rest falls away.  I'm taking care of a patient, grasping desperately into the recesses of my memory, focusing on the actions, what comes next.  I'm in the moment.  I take care of the patient to the best of my abilities, deliver them to the hospital, clean up the ambulance, then I'm done.  It's never easy.  Never goes EXACTLY the way I want it to.  But I'm getting better every call.  Learning.  Enjoying the comradeship of my fellow EMS peers.

But it's the 'real job' that pays the bills.

Unsure how to keep my happiness quotient stable at this point.  Maybe it will come to me.

Will post on the ambulance work when I can.

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