Strange. That's how I feel.
Ten years ago today I was midway through my summer internship with the government. My first federal job. By the time I got to work that day there was a distinct buzz going around. Radios were tuned to the news (no streaming internet for us, no!) No decent TV reception up here either, without a costly satellite dish - back when those were a spendy extravagance. Just listening. Listening to the news in disbelief. Mental flashes of "War of the Worlds" as surely, this must be a joke, right?
I'm such a newcomer to the EMS brotherhood that I don't really know how to feel half the time. It's like I'm peering into someone else's agony and I feel like an intruder.
The truth is, we all lost something that day. Not just EMS, Fire, LE - we lost a feeling of security. That certainty that we are infallible, those of us on the North American continent. We all look at things through new eyes - good or bad. Is that guy in a turban a threat? What about the person over there? Is that baggage unattended? The "Patriot" Act. The wars against terror our soldiers are fighting. We all lost a lot.
That's what I think of when I think back to that awful time in the last few months of 2001.
No, I won't forget.
But I've moved on.
I can't live with that day always on my mind, sorry to disappoint.
I'm living my life - a single woman travelling the streets without a male chaperone. Travelling to other states, provinces, and countries on my own. Working daily at an office job. Moonlighting in the EMS world. Writing blog posts for anyone in the world to read (if they have that right). Gathering with friends when and where I please.
That's my revenge, my way of coping. To live in this great country and do those things that I couldn't were I born elsewhere. And I am desperately thankful for that.
- the ambulance ranger -
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